Blossom away ...

Sunday, 30 April 2017





Spring is my favourite time of the year, there's something about it that makes me feel physically and emotionally well, except for the hayfever which elhamdullah I didn't get this year whoop whoop! I headed out the other day with my growing belly moving more like a walrus now haha to visit my favourite place in Stirling, filling my eyes with these beautiful cherry blossom trees.



Lately I've managed to do my second sunzdid giveaway,  I chose a very special date 10th April my father's birthday, I wanted to celebrate it this year in my own way, he was a very giving and generous person may Allah have mercy on his soul, he loved to draw a smile and was such a positive spirit that could light up a grey day.  So, I though to push myself instead of one winner why not make it three this time and help draw a smile on 3 lucky faces, as a small business owner myself I sure do know how it's hard to get there and succeed, by no means I'm suggesting I am, but I'm trying.  I wanted to give something back I just felt the need to give, hoping it might help them on their journey and definitely cut some expenses out.  


My father's absence still affects my life on a daily basis, I learned after one year and 3 months of his departure that I have my own way to deal with it that's special I try to live the memories and celebrate his life in my own way.  After baba passed away last year, the most that devastated me was him not meeting my now two year old Joud that he absolutely adored, it's something I still have to live with and breaks me a lot.  


I thought for so long how will I make Joud remember dad? they never even met, how could I possibly tell her all about him? how can I describe him? his smile? his personality? the strong character he was? I thought of putting up a scrapbook, drawing everything I could remember all our talks, dreams and those detailed memories of him driving me and my siblings to school, the very old memories that are over 15 years old!! years of memories imprinted in my brain, how could share them with my daughter?I had everything I wanted to use ready and waited for something to start, but I still haven't found it in me to put my dad in a book.   

If you've experienced a loss of a loved one, tell me how did you deal with it? people say time heals, but it remains an open wound forever. 







With Spring's fresh breeze, we are getting ready to welcome our second baby, exciting moments ahead I'm sure, I can't wait to meet the little one inside and can't wait to see Joud's reaction seeing her little brother or sister as we decided this time not to check the baby's gender.  A lot have changed the last year, I've managed to achieve many goals and dreams of mine but the happiness of so many things in life now are just not felt the same, the feeling of happiness from the bottom of the heart is not common without my dad, he'll now miss his second grandchild like he missed my MSc graduation that he was such a huge part of, and so many happy moments in my sibling's lives as well.  Life goes on I was told and it blossoms away...



May Allah grant you the highest place in Jannah

 and may his mercy be upon you 



see you in a better place papa bear x


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18 comments :

  1. Thanks for sharing, loss is really hard I sometimes write a letter never sent to the person who's passed away this is a way to deal with the emotional and all the things left unsaid .

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    1. I still do send my dad messages even though I get "this contact no longer has an account" or so, I know I will not get his response, but I still do it anyways, I still talk to him as if he was here and just imagine his answer.
      Barak Allah fek x

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  2. I too lost my dad....soon after I had my baby...telling her stories of my dad is reliving...I can understand what you are going through....do take care....some memories are for lifetime....

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    1. May Allah join us with our fathers in Jennah!
      It is very hard, maybe when my little one is older that would help, as for now photos and his names are all I can give her.
      Barak Allah fek x

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  3. Thank you for sharing, I can't imagine what you're going through. May Allah continue to make it easy for you, the family and grant those gone back to Allah jannatul firdaus Insha-Allah. (www.beautywithzainy.com and www.spicyfusionkitchen.com)

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    1. Amen amen...Jazak Allah Khaer Zainab x

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  4. Such a beautiful idea! Wonderful way to keep memories of loved ones. May Allah grant your dad Jannatul Firdous sis X

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  5. May Allah bless your father with the best in the hereafter... very touching write up... I know how much my father adores the girls and the way they love him back, so I can only feel what you are going through... We live in a country where there is no spring, it just moves from summer to winter and vice versa so those pictures are like fresh air for me... Best of luck on your impending delivery... May Allah make it easy for you... :)

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    1. Amen Rafeeda thank you very much. Barak Allah fek bless you and your family x

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  6. Hey sis... beautiful pictures of blossoms. Are you in Japan? Do you know about the philosophy of life from the cherry blossoms? Many Japanese believe that the blooming of the trees symbolises the transience of life and is an annual reminder that time is precious. Life is short... I don't know if you really picked this symbolism for this post as tribute to your dad's passing. I'm sure he is in a better place where blossoms are always in full bloom.

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    1. Thank you Flora,
      No, actually I'm in Scotland, I didn't know of that before, that's quite interesting to know, life is short subhanAllah, we think its forever but it ends in an instant!
      I'm not sure actually, the blooming process might be why I chose this post to tribute my dad, it's also the timing and my father's birthday I guess that made this post, amen Flora barak Allah fek x

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  7. AMEEN! May Allah make it easy on you and your family. I absolutely loved the pictures, especially the one of your daughter, and the one of the cherry blossom flowers on the book. Its gorgeous mA. I have yet to see cherry blossom trees and I can't wait.

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    1. Ameen, jazak Allah khaer Afra, they are stunning trees I must say!
      catch them before they wither away now x

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  8. Congratulations on your pregnancy for your second! It must be hard that your father didn't get to meet your daughter. May Allah grant him the highest rank in Jannah.

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  9. Ah such a huge loss�� May Allah make everything easy for you.
    Death of someone really close breaks you from inside. I've experienced the death of my grand father & trust me I can't express my emotions. It's been 4 years now but still I don't know how to react or how to say what I loved about him. It's difficult, very difficult.
    Do what you want to do, if you like to write everything about him on a notebook, do it but I know it's quite difficult. You can't pen down all your emotions & feelings. I can't suggest you anything, I am so so sorry because I don't really know how to do this you know!
    And oh Congratulations on the good news ❤ so happy about you!

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    1. Thank you Yousra, may we meet our loved ones once again in Jennah inshAllah.
      That's the thing I can't get myself to do it, its very very difficult when your emotions just break through and strangle you, you ask yourself am really doing this now? is this what I have left? inallelah wa ina elayhi rajeoun...
      Jazak Allah khaer x

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